Melissa

Melissa Rau

I was born in Kansas City, Missouri and raised in Columbia, Missouri (Go Mizzou!). I come from a small family – lucky to have parents who are still happily married, an older brother and soon to be sister-in-law! I went to the University of Dayton (in Ohio) – starting as an undeclared engineering major, switched to an accounting major, grudgingly saw it through to graduation but then put in a few more semesters at Belmont University in Nashville and walked away with a second undergrad degree in Music Business.  I joined the workforce via EMI Christian Music Group, and worked with music I love. I wasn’t a fan of working, wasn’t a fan of Nashville, and thought the grass must be greener somewhere else.  Two years later, I applied for a job with the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation (FDIC).  They called and offered me an interview for the Little Rock Field Office.  I told a friend I was afraid I would move here and love it and “have to say I’m from Arkansas.”  And I’ve certainly eaten those words.  I do love it here, but I’m proud to say I’m from Arkansas!  For the first time in my life, the “grass is always greener” fever has gone down.  I have no clue what the future holds. In the near future, I’d be thrilled to travel less for my job, plug in more within the community, build deeper relationships with my friends, serve the one-year olds in the church nursery, and teach my dog not to bark.

I began participating in my God story in junior high, through my friend’s youth group and then a Luis Palau event (which I thought was only an Audio Adrenaline concert). Went on my first mission trip a few months later, and became continually more involved at the church.  Moved 8 hours away for college, jumped into Campus Crusade for Christ and the first church I ever fell in love with [Apex Community Church!]. I experienced incredible fellowship, but for some odd reason, felt like I was too dependent in my faith on the fellowship I had within crusade.  I moved to Nashville seeking dependence solely on Christ.  This didn’t quite work as planned and  I ended up isolated, with no community, unmotivated in my pursuit of Christ, and feeling like a failure.  Apparently, I didn’t believe Christ was all I needed.  That’s how I felt at least.  I felt lost. Extremely confused. I needed the close community of believers I had in college. I didn’t understand how everyone else could live without it. And I lost faith that close community was even possible.  I took the job with the FDIC and moved to Little Rock – desperate to get out of Nashville.  My first year was difficult – so different from Nashville.  The people I met befriended me, prayed for me, supported me from the beginning.  But my heart was gradually hardening.  Though I thought I’d so intentionally walked down the path I was on, I got to a point where I stopped, looked around, and didn’t know how I’d arrived at this place in life.  On the outside, I thought my life looked stable and successful.  I had a well paying job, lived in a nice place, drove a nice car, and had good friends.  Few people knew that I felt anything but stable and successful.  I felt angry, cynical, irritable, discontent.  But as distant as I felt from God, He was not distant from me.  In the past year, I have seen God doing amazing things in my life!  Though the road has been hard, God has been faithful.  He has turned my life around.  He has renewed a prayerful spirit within me; He has given me a growing hunger for His Word; He is re-training me in what it means to be a friend; He is teaching me that a life about others is true life.

Pop Quiz:

1) Most Formative Moment of your life (other than coming to know Jesus)

Being diagnosed with Chronic Depression & the road to recovery.

2) Favorite Jr. High fashion statement you wish you could resurrect

Some history just shouldn’t repeat itself. Ever.

3) Top moment of personal glory or achievement

Getting the title to my car.

4) Aspect of God’s character most endearing to you

His thoughts are not my thoughts. Nor are His ways my ways.

5) Worst you’ve ever felt

The first night I got my puppy… he was the perfect new puppy – went happily to his kennel, slept through the night, didn’t cry at all. Well, Howie didn’t cry, but I did! I felt so awful for taking Howie away from the only family he knew. Okay, so maybe not the absolute worst I ever felt… but it’s all I can come up with!

6) Best Childhood Cartoon and why

I don’t remember watching many cartoons, but Sesame Street taught me how to count to 10 in Spanish.

7) All time greatest jam for a High School Dance

I wasn’t a fan of dances in general.  Prideful wallflowers without dates would rather be somewhere else!

8 ) Chief aspiration for the rest of this decade

Dear question. I hate you. I’m sorry, it’s nothing personal, but I’m not a forward-thinker, goal-setter, or dreamer.  Just so long as I’m still seeking life from the only one who gives it, that’s sufficient for me.